Why Do I Feel FOMO in College?
You’re finally in college. The freedom, independence, and the chance to do all the things you’ve seen in movies and TikToks for years. But somehow, instead of feeling excited, you’re sitting alone in your dorm on a Saturday night. You’re scrolling through stories of people laughing at parties or out on adventures, wondering why it feels like everyone else is living the college dream… except you. If that sounds familiar, we need to talk about FOMO.
Because it’s not just about parties or missing out on fun. It’s about identity, connection, and the pressure to “make the most” of your college experience. And if you’ve ever caught yourself thinking, “Why do I feel so left out when I’m doing everything I’m supposed to?”, you’re not alone. Working with a therapist for college students in Evanston & Chicago, IL can help you unpack those feelings and reconnect with what actually matters to you. Let’s dive in.
What Even Is FOMO?
FOMO (fear of missing out) gets thrown around a lot, but when you’re actually feeling it? It’s not funny. It’s that gnawing feeling that you’re not where you’re supposed to be. Or worse, that everyone else knows something you don’t. In college, where everything is new and the pressure to make friends and “have the best years of your life” is sky-high, FOMO can hit hard. It’s not just about being left out of one event. It’s about the story your brain starts to tell you: that you’re behind, that people are bonding without you, that you’re not doing college right. That narrative? It’s exhausting.
Why College Makes FOMO Worse
College is marketed like a highlight reel. Endless fun, close-knit friend groups, and unforgettable memories. But what they don’t show you is how much downtime, homesickness, and awkward transitions are also part of it. You’re supposed to be building your future and your social life, managing stress and having fun, all while figuring out who the heck you are. It’s a lot. And social media only makes it louder. You might have stayed in to recharge or study, but one scroll through your feed makes it feel like everyone else is out there living their best life without you.
It creates this pressure to be on all the time. To say yes to every invite, to document every hangout, to constantly compare. If you’re feeling that disconnect, like you’re constantly catching up but never quite landing, that’s not weird. That’s FOMO doing what it does best. And that’s exactly what a therapist for college students in Chicago & Evanston, IL can help you explore: what’s real, what’s noise, and what actually matters to you.
Signs FOMO Might Be Running the Show
FOMO isn’t always loud. Sometimes it’s sneaky. It shows up in the little ways—how you scroll, how you compare, how you feel after seeing other people’s posts. You might not even realize it’s what you’re feeling until you start noticing:
- Focusing gets harder because refreshing Instagram or TikTok becomes a constant habit.
- Social plans feel like obligations, and saying no feels risky—even when you’re exhausted.
- That post-party scroll leaves you feeling low, even if your own night was fine.
- It’s easy to second-guess your choices when someone else’s life looks shinier.
FOMO can make you feel like you’re chasing something you can’t quite catch. It tricks you into believing that just one more event, one more post, one more hangout will fix everything. But that constant chase takes a toll. Over time, it can mess with your self-worth, your boundaries, and your ability to enjoy the life you do have.
What FOMO Is Actually About
Here’s the thing: FOMO usually isn’t just about the event you didn’t attend. It’s about wanting to feel connected, included, and like you matter. It’s about worrying that you’re missing out on friendship, belonging, or a version of yourself you’re “supposed” to be.
And that feeling is valid. But it’s also really common. Especially in your late teens and early twenties when you’re navigating so much change at once. That’s why working with a young adult therapist can be so helpful. You can unpack the pressure, sort through the social noise, and start to understand what your version of connection, fun, and fulfillment looks like.
What You Can Actually Do About It
FOMO doesn’t just disappear by ignoring it. It sticks around and sneaks into places you don’t expect. But you can learn how to recognize when it’s taking over. And you can manage it in a way that makes space for what really matters to you.
Notice How Social Media Affects You
Some people can scroll without spiraling. Some can’t. Be honest about what your feed is doing to your mindset and whether it’s helping or hurting how you feel about your life. Social media isn’t all bad. But if it’s making you question your own choices or constantly compare, it might be time to take a step back.
Ask Yourself Why You’re Saying Yes
Is it because you actually want to go? Or because you’re scared of being the one who missed it? Saying yes out of pressure isn’t the same as saying yes with intention. Learning the difference can help you protect your energy and feel more in control of your time.
Define Your Version of Fun
Not everyone wants to party, join a sorority, or go out five nights a week. And that’s okay. College should be about discovering what lights you up, not just copying what everyone else is doing. Your version of fun is valid, even if it doesn’t show up on anyone’s highlight reel.
Get Comfortable With Quiet
You don’t have to fill every moment to be “doing college right.” Rest is not a sign you’re boring, it’s a sign you’re human. Quiet moments can be grounding, restorative, and honestly… kind of underrated. Giving yourself space to just be is an act of self-respect.
Talk to Someone
Therapy for college students isn’t just for big breakdowns. It can be a space to sort out the overwhelm and get back to what actually feels good for you. Having a neutral, nonjudgmental place to process everything can make a big difference. You don’t have to figure it all out on your own.
FOMO Doesn’t Mean You’re Failing 
Let’s be real: you can do everything right and still feel like you’re missing out. That doesn’t mean you’re broken. It means you’re human, and that this whole “college experience” thing is a lot messier than people admit. You’re not the only one who’s felt this way. And you don’t have to pretend it’s all fine when it’s not. Whether you’re drowning in comparison, struggling to find your people, or just tired of chasing something that never quite clicks, therapy can help. Working with a therapist for college students in Chicago & Evanston, IL can give you space to figure out what’s actually working for you. It can also help you notice what’s just pressure dressed up as fun. You deserve more than a highlight reel. You deserve something real.
Reconnect With What Actually Matters Through Therapy for College Students in Chicago, IL
If FOMO is leaving you exhausted, second-guessing yourself, or just feeling kind of lost, you’re not alone. Therapy for college students in Chicago, IL can help you get grounded in what actually matters to you, not what your feed says should matter.
At Evanston Counseling, our therapists get it. Whether you want to talk with a young adult therapist in Illinois or explore what’s underneath the pressure to be everywhere and do everything, we’re here to help. Let’s find your version of connection, without the comparison spiral. Here’s how to get started:
- Reach out to schedule a free consultation.
- Talk with a therapist who gets what college is really like.
- Start feeling more like yourself again—no FOMO required.
Other Therapy Services at Evanston Counseling
At Evanston Counseling, we support college students and young adults who are feeling the weight of burnout, loneliness, or the pressure to always be “on.” We understand how overwhelming it can feel to balance school, social life, and your mental health. Especially when it looks like everyone else is thriving. That’s why we offer therapy for college students in Evanston and Chicago, IL, along with therapy for young adults, parents, and individuals working through anxiety, depression, and life transitions. Our therapists use a range of approaches like CBT, hypnotherapy, and even pet therapy. Whether you’re looking for a space to vent, reflect, or reset, our therapists are here to support you. We want to help you feel more grounded and connected, to yourself and to what matters most.